As many of you will identify, our baby girl went through two days of near nonstop sleeping, to be followed by two days of near nonstop crying. It breaks our hearts when we can’t figure out how to meet her needs. And, of course, we need relief from pacing the living room floor with her on our shoulder as well.
I wonder how other parents handle this. You know, those moment when your baby is inconsolable. I’m not talking about picking her up, trying to feed her, trying to burp her, changing her diaper, and then giving up. I’m talking about trying all that plus swaddling, laying her on her side in your arms while you swing her from side to side and make the shooshing sound in her ear. I’m talking about putting her in her carseat next to the washer/dryer and turning them both on. And on, and on, and on. When nothing works for more than five minutes, what do you do?
I don’t have the perfect answer. Honestly, I’ve just followed my intuition. If something occurs to me, I try it. If it doesn’t work, I try something else. But I haven’t discovered any foolproof way to guarantee she’ll stop crying. I wish I had.
In the meantime, intuition is your most priceless treasure. Listen to that small voice in the background of your being that also tells you when you’ve done something wrong. Listen, and do what it says (as long as it’s sensible and not dangerous). As a father or mother, you have been given parental instincts. But God also gave you wisdom and discernment. Always listen to your instincts, and then double check what they’re telling you with your wisdom and discernment.
Sometimes I have a sense that my baby girl just needs the warmth and cushion of daddy holding her. Her head rests on my shoulder as I hold her little body against my chest. The masculine presence and warmth sometimes meets a very real need. Then there are other times when the only thing that matters is being close to mommy. I don’t mind at all. I take joy in the fact that mommy is THE MAJOR COMFORT in her life. Not only does that take the pressure off of me to be the permanent comfort, but it also reaffirms that I picked a wonderful woman who can not only comfort and love me, but our child as well.
But when we’re at our wits’ end, as we were just 30 minutes ago, we start experimenting. I had baby girl resting on my shoulder as we paced the living room while mommy changed clothes. We were going to put her in the car and go for a drive to see if the movement and the engine sounds would calm her down. She had been crying in long spurts for hours. Then, all of a sudden, she’s asleep on my shoulder. We’re both amazed and intensely grateful. I carried her around the house until my arm fell asleep, and then I laid her down on the bed beside her mom and she has been fairly content to just rest and suck her thumb/hand.
You never know what will work this time. Thank God something worked.
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