My wife and I just returned from a trip. We were looking at potential relocation possibilities. The place was terribly polluted with diesel fumes in the cities and beautiful a ways outside of town.
I heard a guy speak who prays for people to be healed everywhere he goes. At the bus stop, in the restaurant, at the mall. If he sees anyone with an obvious malady, he asks them what’s wrong and offers to pray for them. Sometimes, he gets a word of knowledge about a non-obvious disease or ailment and asks the stranger if that means anything to them. He has seen tons of people healed just by doing this.
There are moments in the week when you say or do something hurtful. Your wife is wounded. She’s angry. She isolates herself and doesn’t want to be near you.
Happens to me at least once a month like clockwork. I don’t intend it to happen, but we’re human. What else can be said but that? She is who she is and I am who I am and we don’t see eye to eye on everything.
Be open and willing to accept a word in due season from ANY source, especially one close to you. Husbands, honor your wives by listening very closely to their advice and concerns. Wisdom is found in a multitude of counsel. And your wife is your #1 advisor. She is on your side, and has your best interests at heart.
As we took our evening walk around the neighborhood, I heard laughter from the backyard of one home as we passed by. Peering through the slats as we walked by, I could see a dozen or more people our age hanging out at a pool, having a Saturday night party/hangout. I remembered the times when I went to pool parties and other social happenings before I was married. I had no ties, so I could pick up and go anytime I wanted. Granted, I came home alone every night as well, so it’s not like the freedom to roam was that wonderful.
Still, when day after day is spoken for, and about the only spontaneous thing you can do is to choose what toy to next play with your child, the freedom of days past has a certain allure.
Every parent should have time away. It should be built into our lives along with every other necessity. Becoming a parent doesn’t change your core personal needs, like privacy, silence, and time to reflect. We each have our own unique needs, and we need to make sure they are met. Whatever it takes to recharge your batteries, don’t pass up the opportunity to make it happen.
Our families benefit most from our presence and our involvement when we have the most to give. Would you rather spend four hours with someone who is tired and used up? Or would you rather have two hours with someone who is refreshed and able to enjoy the present?
We live with the sacrifices and choices we made to become married and parents. But we don’t have to punish ourselves needlessly. Find a parent, sibling, friend, or babysitter who can help you take a few hours away to recharge doing whatever it is you need.
Remember, your family needs quality time more than quantity time.
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